I remember the day we got our SSC results, we girls had a blast, I topped and threw a party. At home, mumma had made cutlets kheema pattice, wafers, and what not. After SSC, Graduation is most important for any student. But when we got our engineering results; none of us were together to celebrate our graduation as we all had started our post-grad courses and obviously we had no time!
My papa-mumma called to congratulate, I could not see their tears of joy or their proud smiles.
I was well-known for my cricket craziness in college, especially since I was the only girl who followed the game so passionately. I never missed a match at Wankhede. It’s been four years since I’ve been to the stadium. I dunno for how long I won’t see one again at the stadium…
Hey, you know what my childhood friend is getting married, I’ve known her for 20 years now but I can’t attend her wedding, well no holiday; just started a course…
My best friend from engineering days is tying the knot, he has been my best friend among guys for years now, and we have had a blast, but I just visited India a year back, and can’t again.
Will miss his wedding too…
It’s my wedding, I’ve dreamt of it for years, but certainly not this way; I will be in India for only 3 weeks and get back here again. I have not done any of my shopping, mum and sis have done everything. Have no clue how Indian weddings happen, the preps and festivities behind it. I’ve had no time to be there that long. My friends can’t make it cause they are all occupied with their jobs and work. It was a hurried wedding, cause we could not delay it further!...
My younger sister is getting engaged, the only one who has been close to me. She and I used to fight like crazy, cannot believe she is getting engaged. I can’t attend it, cause my job does not permit me so many holidays and trips to India. I cried my heart out to nani on the day of her engagement; but what am I cribbing about, my hubby and I chose to live here, did we not?...
It's Diwali, the entire family is having a get-together, my sister was describing the shopping and the gifts everyone has got, I’m missing my brothers, it is Bhaubij, they are missing me too but they all are together and I’m not there...
My school pal needed us girls everywhere, the smallest of shopping, the minutest of things, today she is doing everything by herself, and not once has she complained to few of us here that she will miss us at her wedding and wedding preps. She says she has accepted the fact that we are not there, she knows we miss her and feel terrible about it, but neither can she nor we do anything about it, so no point cribbing, But she keeps sending mails, describing every little stages of her wedding preparations, she sounds so excited. Hey is it that big, I too got married but I never experienced that!
It’s her important day, she wants to enjoy it without such thoughts; we all wish we were there, we can’t be.
Why? Cause we chose not to…
My other sis is in UK, she just had a little baby, her parents could enjoy the joy of their grandchild only for a month and they do not know when they will meet her next, once a year maybe and the little kid will never know what grandparents are like! She won’t even know her mausi; who could not be there for her birth, naming ceremony, her first birthday, I do not know if I will ever attend her b-days or keep merely sending her gifts through the internet and make phone calls.
I remember my b-day when the whole house was filled with my family, my mama-mamis, chacha-chahis, mausi, sis-bros, friends; now it’s always me and my roomies, or maybe a few batchmates, colleagues at work…
Mumma-papa-sis-bro all call. It’s great hearing their voices. I dunno when I will see them, work is getting hectic, trips getting postponed…
My mum recalls all the events in her life with so much glitter in her eyes, her life today is complete, the memories will stay with her forever, she can recall each event as if it was happening in front of her right now.
I have only voices to recall, cause I’ve not met my closest ones in years...
I’ve missed all the important events in their life; and will keep doing so...
I know they understand...
Ya I chose it, the great education and money abroad...
What am I complaining about?
Now for some reality check, I’m very much in India and never went abroad. I was feeling awfully bad that few of my closest family members and friends had missed my engagement and some of them would be missing my marriage too.
I wrote that piece placing myself in their shoes and thinking about life there. The writing flowed in cause as much I felt bad and missed them at such an important day in my life I knew they’d be feeling worse than me.
However, at the end of the day all I could tell myself was, Minal, Such is Life!